One question we hear over and over again is, “Can I date during my divorce?” If you’re wondering the same thing, you have plenty of company. Many of our clients have been unhappily married for years or decades and can’t wait to enjoy themselves again, and who can blame them? If a hollow marriage or something else has left you anxious to take a dip back into the dating pool and maybe even try out one of those popular dating apps, we get it and so do many of our clients.
Should you date? Can you date? Will your divorce attorney advise you to wait until the divorce is final? Will your ex find out you’re on a dating app and turn it against you in court? In a perfect world, we’d advise you to wait until the divorce is final, but that’s unrealistic for a lot of people. So, instead of saying you can’t date, we’re going to say that if you date, to proceed with caution.
What Do Judges Think About Dating Apps?
Like California, New York is a rather progressive state. Do judges care if you sign up for Tinder, Bumble, or OkCupid while your divorce is still pending in the court? Not really, but your spouse on the other hand...only you know how he or she will react. If they find out and it blows up, it could turn a friendly divorce into a contested, litigated divorce – something to keep in mind.
If you want to sign up for a dating app, we suggest you wait until you’re physically separated. Meaning, you no longer live under the same roof together. If you’re sleeping on the couch or if one of you are sleeping in the guest bedroom, hold off on the dating app until you’re no longer living together. Other than that, here’s our advice:
- Consider talking to your ex about dating.
- Be discreet!
- Avoid taking your date places where your ex frequents.
- Consider group outings instead of one-on-one dates.
- Consider dating in a neighboring town to avoid running into your ex.
- Avoid posting any pics of your dates on social media.
- Be honest with your dates. Inform them that you’re going through a divorce.
- Ask your divorce attorney about spending money on your dates and how to avoid spending marital assets on them.
If you have questions or concerns about dating during divorce, you should seek legal advice and we can help you with that. To schedule your free initial consultation, contact us today!